There’s an assortment of articles about helping us build healthy relationships with our partners and loved ones. But we don’t hear nearly as much about the most important relationship in our lives: the one with ourselves.

As writer and photographer Susannah Conway said, “Your relationship with yourself is the foundation of everything.”

“A healthy self-relationship is the ability to value yourself as a person, and embrace your strengths and weaknesses,” said Julie Hanks, LCSW, a therapist and blogger at Psych Central. She’s realized that her strengths and weaknesses are two sides of the same coin. “I am a passionate and creative person and with those strengths comes the tendency to be disorganized and emotionally overwhelmed,” she said.

“It means simply considering yourself, every day,” Duffy said. That consideration includes self-care, self-respect, goodwill and self-love, he said.

Regardless of whether you’re used to extending love and kindness your way, you can build and bolster that healthy bond. These are six ideas on cultivating a good relationship with yourself.

  1. Care for your needs.

[…] getting enough sleep and rest, eating nutrients and exercising.

  1. Joy is important.

“Prioritize the activities that bring you joy and fill your emotional reserves,” […]

  1. Focus on your inner world.

[…] “What am I feeling? What am I thinking?”

Also, consider the why behind your behavior, thoughts and feelings. […]

  1. Regularly make time for yourself. […]
  1. Meditate. […]
  1. Be your own best friend.

“Any time you hear the negative put-downs swirling around your head, think about what you’d say to your best friend or sister or daughter, and then rewrite the script with love,” Conway said.

Again, cultivating a positive relationship with yourself is the building block for your whole world. As Hanks said, “It’s crucial to have a great relationship with ourselves because it’s the only relationship that you are guaranteed to have every day of your life!”

Is your day-to-day life full of stress and chaos?

Are you scrambling to find a peaceful moment in the day when you can put your feet up and relax? Are you rushed, stressed out and ready to call it quits.

Why is that so? Who is responsible for it? Why have we made it so difficult?

The solution is simple: simply your life. It’s the implementation part that is hard, but here are my top tips to help with that:

#1 Believe in yourself , but be aware of your limitations

#2 De-clutter & simplify

#3 Use everything in moderation

#4 Keep things in perspective

#5 Treat others how they want to be treated

#6 Family first

#7 Pay attention to the moment

#8 Have a positive mindset

#9 Educate yourself

#10 Be passionate about something

#11 Always be reflective

#12 Surround yourself with supportive people

#13 Banish the word “perfection”

#14 Fix it, or deal with it, but stop whining about it

#15 Remember things that you are grateful for

#16 You can have it all, just not at the same time

Read the article for more details.

New Clever Pictogram Movie Posters by H-57

Designer Matteo Civaschi of Milan-based creative studio H-57 just sent us this awesome new collection of pictogram movie posters. A follow-up to their clever pictogram history posters, this set takes some popular movies, both old and new, and condenses their plots down to their most basic forms.

“This new set of stories shows our passion for the great, super-popular movies of all time,” Civaschi tells us. “You have the movies that made the world cry (E.T.), scream (Alien, The Shining), think (The Matrix), hope (Robin Hood), and so on. Each movie, if it’s really great, can create a whole new world, tell a story that’s never been told before, and give life to unforgettable characters.

“Squeezing all of these things into a few icons is fun. In the case of particularly long movies or sagas (like The Lord of the Rings), the final result is even funnier.”

H-57 first caught our attention a few years ago with their creative Star Wars typography posters. If you enjoyed this new series, make sure to check out Viktor Hertz’s own take on pictogram movie posters.

Pictured above: The Matrix.

Gorgeous Long-Exposure Shots That Transform New York City Landmarks

For his City Stages series, photographer Matthew Pillsbury imposes a hushed calm on normally busy settings, shooting hour-length exposures with a large format 8 X 10 view camera. The effect isn’t just lovely to look at; it also belies a deeper meaning. “The ghostlike appearance of my subjects wasn’t something I set out to pursue,” he explained to Slate. “But I do find it fascinating to highlight the fragility, the evanescence of our lives. We are here only briefly. Every moment passing bringing us closer to our last. Much of photography is an attempt to stop the clock—to assert our presence: ‘I was here, I matter.’ Here, my photographs are doing something different: We are shown the fragility and fleeting nature of our presence.”

Pictured above: iPhone 5 Launch Day, Apple Store Fifth Avenue, Sept. 21, 2012.

Update: Milan’s Awesome Vertical Forest

The BioMilano vision promises to incorporate 60 abandoned farms into a greenbelt surrounding the city and as part of this vision the Bosco Verticale finds its way into fruition. The building’s design boasts a stunning green façade planted with dense forest systems to provide a building microclimate and to filter out polluting dust particles. Along with that, the living bio-canopy helps to absorb CO2, oxygenate the air, moderate extreme temperatures and lower noise pollution. Not only is this visually pleasing but it also helps to lower living costs.

A 27-Story Vertical Forest Grows in Milan

Bosco Verticale was conceived in response to the alarming levels of air pollution in Milan. The structure itself is no more radical than your average high-rise tower block, but when fortified with over 700 balcony-perched trees, not only will the buildings look like two enormous topiaries in the middle of the city, but they will also filter dust particles, absorb carbon dioxide, and protect the apartment complexes within from radiation and acoustic pollution (yes, you can live in there). Meanwhile, the verticality is a statement about urban sprawl, sending a 10,000 square meter forest upwards into the sky.

There’s no shortage of good advice on how to bolster willpower, including one piece I’d be smart to take: Don’t hide your resolutions in a drawer.

Other ideas include keeping goals realistic, planning how they’ll be implemented and enlisting the help of friends and family for encouragement and accountability. These are all helpful tips, but there’s one important thing missing: belief. Specifically, recent studies suggest that when it comes to willpower, we get what we expect.

The new findings fly in the face of previous thinking about willpower, which tended to put the emphasis on power. In this way of looking at things, willpower was seen as a muscle that was easily depleted. Newer research casts doubt on this limited-resource theory and instead suggests that we have as much willpower as we expect to have. In this alternative model, willpower works less like a muscle and more like a placebo.

This matters, because willpower’s importance goes well beyond keeping New Year’s promises. Indeed, researchers find that willpower (or self-regulation) also predicts academic, professional and financial success better than IQ and other aptitude scores. People with lots of willpower work harder, avoid tempting distractions and persist until a task is completed.

Another common belief about willpower is that it is taxing — that exercising self-control or willpower burns a lot of energy. But does it? Not according to Robert Kurzban, a University of Pennsylvania psychologist. […] As Kurzban noted, people actually perform better on self-control tasks after vigorous exercise, which burns far more calories than self-regulation does.

None of this means that keeping resolutions will be easy. But willpower is most likely to let us down if we expect it to. Take care with your list of resolutions for 2013. Narrow it to the goals you really care about. Make a plan. Get the support of your loved ones. Seek out accountability. For God’s sake, don’t stuff the list in a drawer. And last, but certainly not least, have faith in your willpower.

Give yourself reasons to believe, despite the sorry statistics and even your own track record. Think back on the many challenges you have mastered, especially when you stumbled along the way. If your goal is important enough to you, chances are you can achieve it, and a little more faith in your willpower could help.

In his book Dreamland: Adventures in the Strange Science ofSleep__, author David K. Randall calls sleep “one of the dirty little secrets of science.” That’s because despite spending almost a third of our lives sleeping, we don’t really know much about the process of sleep.

[T]he discovery of the stages of sleep shattered this perspective. For instance, our brains are just as active in REM sleep — aptly named rapid eye movement because our eyes shift rapidly against our lids — as they are when we’re awake.

In Dreamland, Randall shares a slew of these fascinating, surprising and eye-opening facts, anecdotes and research studies. These are a few curious tidbits from his book.

Continuous vs segmented sleep:

Today, we think that sleeping through the night is a sign of normal and healthy slumber. In fact, people who wake up around the same time every night think their sleep is fractured — and that something is wrong, Randall writes. And when they complain about this concern to their doctors, they probably walk away with a sleeping pill, he says.

But segmented sleep has actually been the norm for thousands of years — that is, until the advent of artificial lighting. In the 1980s and ‘90s, history professor Roger Ekirch began seeing interesting patterns in his book collection, which included tales and medical texts: references to “first sleep” and “second sleep.”

Randall notes that other studies have confirmed that people naturally experience segmented sleep. And in areas with no artificial light, people still experience first and second sleep.

On naps:

In our society, naps are viewed as luxurious activities only reserved for the privileged or the lazy. That’s a shame, because research continues to show the benefits of naps and discredit these beliefs.

One study found that astronauts who slept for just 15 minutes had better cognitive performance, even when there was no boost in their alertness or ability to pay attention.

Another study found that participants who napped and experienced the deeper stages of sleep had more flexible thinking. They were able to apply information they memorized to a new task much better than participants who watched a movie instead of napping.

Randall also notes that participants who take naps outperform their counterparts who aren’t allowed to doze off on other various tasks.

Wrapping up, the importance of sleep research:

While sleep research is in its infancy, one fact is undeniable: Sleep is vital for everything from our survival to our success.

When functioning optimally, sleep can sharpen our thinking and help us problem solve (like golfer Jack Nicklaus did when he figured out how to tweak his swing in his sleep). When gone wrong – as in cases of sleepwalking and sleep deprivation – it can distort our cognitive skills, sink our mood and even make us dangerous.

As Randall notes, “Sleep isn’t a break from our lives. It’s the missing third of the puzzle of what it means to be living.”

The Science of Productivity, Animated

After their illustrated primer on the science of procrastination, the fine folks of AsapSCIENCE are back with a look at the science of productivity — including studies confirming that willpower is an exhaustible source and habit is the key to everything, and specific, actionable strategies for boosting your own efficiency, like crafting a good daily routine and keeping a notebook.